The best way to kill a zombie

A good story

A photo with President Barack Obama with a lightsaber

Bwahahahbahahwa

Magic

Stop what you are doing right now and spend some time reading about magic. Errr MAGIC.

HERE.

King fish

new album from Levon

For Amber

Who spends her evenings playing Super Mario Bros.

Han Solo PI = greatness

Incredibly Important News

The final issue of Planetary to ship in October. Read all about it here.

I'm back at work today.

Murder

Shocking

Journalism and Star Trek

This post over at CJR is pretty funny.

Yesterday’s rave review of the new Star Trek film referred to the “hateful Klingon Nero” (Take it to the bridge, page 9, Film & Music). Numerous readers got in touch to say how very wrong this was.

Read it here.

Letters from Spock

The new Star Trek as you know by now gives us two Spocks. Old Spock who has lived out his life but traveled back in time to when young Spock is just beginning his career in Star Fleet. Now, it's true that the universe is altered pretty dramatically but aren't there some things will happen the exact same way to young Spock that they happened to Old Spock.

Yeah, I just got a nosebleed thinking about it. Still, if it were you wouldn't you send an e-mail every once in a while to give your younger self a heads up about some dangers.

Lets take a peek.

Old Spock: Dear Spock, hope you are doing well. Today the crew of the Enterprise will revive Kahn. Instead of doing that you should blow him out of an airlock. Don't talk back, trust me, it's better for everyone this way. Kill him. No, no, seriously do not, under any circumstances exile him to Ceti Alpha V.

A week later

Old Spock: Don't eat that ham sandwich today.

Two weeks after that
Old Spock: Jim will kiss Uhura today so you might want to do something about that.

A Month after that

Old Spock: Seriously, have you killed Kahn yet? It's really, really important.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Star Trek and Top Gun

Anybody remember Top Gun? I'm a fan of 80's Tom Cruise. He did several of the same movie over and over again. Kind of like John Wayne and Rio Bravo. The Duke liked the plot of that movie so much he remade it twice, Once as El Dorado and once as Rio Lobo.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, Tom Cruise. By the way we will get to Star Trek eventually, because it is Star Trek week here on Buckshot. During the 80s Tom Cruise made, I don't know, a half dozen of the movies that Roger Ebert dubbed The Tom Cruise movie.

Essentially, Cruise is a hotshot young professional, pilot, NASCAR driver, pool hustler and bartender. Cruise is all raw talent and nerve, a mixture of arrogance and talent.

But he's never the best that he can be because he needs an older guy to come along and guide him to his destiny and the love of a good woman.

The best of these is Days of Thunder, the NASCAR picture because it's got Robert Duval and Nicole Kidman in it. A close second is Top Gun. I know you know the plot already but in short Cruise is a rebel pilot who has daddy issues. He likes fast cars, fast planes and fast women. He's also the best damn pilot in the Navy.

There's a really iconic shot where Cruise rides his motorcycle next to the base and the F14s.

Cruise also has daddy issues because the Navy has always made it seem like his father, who was also a pilot, died an unheroic death.

That gets straightened out by Cruises' mentor in this exchange:

VIPER: Yeah, he did it right... Is that why you fly the way you do? Trying to prove something? Yeah your old man did it right. What I'm about to tell you is classified. It could end my career. We were in the worst dogfight I ever dreamed of. There were bogeys like fireflies all over the sky. His F-4 was hit, and he was wounded, but he could've made it back. He stayed in it, saved three planes before he bought it.
Maverick: How come I never heard that before?
Viper: Well that's not something the State Department tells dependents when the battle occurred over the wrong line on some map.

So in the new Star Trek movie (see I told you we'd get to Star Trek eventually) we're introduced to Jim T. Kirk a hotshot young genius who's a hotshot and the best there is at, well, everything, including bar fights and making out with green chicks.

There's an iconic scene where Kirk drives his motorcycle near the spaceships.

Kirk is also wounded by the heroic death of his father on the same day of birth.

That get's straightened out this way.

Christopher Pike: Your father was captain of a starship for twelve minutes. He saved 800 lives, including yours. I dare you to do better. Enlist in Starfleet.


IMDB trivia has this to say

To prepare for his role as Captain James Kirk, Chris Pine watched classic episodes and read encyclopedias about the Star Trek universe. However, his research was rudimentary, as he wanted his performance to be original and not an imitation of William Shatner. He based his performance on Tom Cruise's Maverick and Harrison Ford's Han Solo and Indiana Jones, heroes who Pine felt possessed the archetypal hero qualities Kirk has (humour, arrogance, decisiveness).

Oh, and one more thing.

That Navy Ship that Maverick served on in Top Gun: It was the USS Enterprise.



Man, I need a life.


Tomorrow on Star Trek week, Old Spock's letters to Young Spock.

STAR TREK SPOILERS

Don't read this post if you haven't seen the new Star Trek.







OK




So, now my head is exploded. First of all, The new Star Trek movie exists in an alternate reality where time travel messed everything up. That means a couple of things.

First, the original series, the one with William Shatner in it still exists, all the movies still exists but they are in a completely separate universe. But, and this is a big but NOW, there is a completely different STAR TREK universe. In this new universe the phasers look more like guns, no one ever preaches to you about the meaning of the story or the lesson humanity needs to learn, SULU is an amazing swordsman and Chekov can't speak English.

Also, for some reason everybody needs sunglasses while on the bridge of the Enterprise because there are giant, bright lights everywhere.

The onion described it this way: Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film as 'Fun, Watchable.'

Yeah, that about covered it.

Rogers called it ULTIMATE STAR TREK and that is as good a designation as any.

I loved it but my eyes melted at one point thinking about time travel.

As I was watching the movie I kept waiting for the moment where everything would return to normal. Where the crew would somehow change time so that the universe went back to Shatner land.

And that moment never happened.

HOLY CRAP, JJ ABRAMS just killed Star Trek.

This is exactly what John Byrne did to Superman in the 80's when he recreated him. All of sudden Superman was depowered and the superpets never existed. The world needs Beppo, the Supermonkey guys. It's important.


But what happens to Picard now? Is Picard never born?? Can this at least mean that Tasha Yar is never born because she sucks.

And all of DS9, Voyager and Enterprise can disappear too. DS9 especially because it's a crummy rip off of Babylon 5.

OK, that's enough for now.

Final Analysis: Great Movie, go see it now. But later you'll be a little depressed that there wasn't a comment on the current state of humanity. Without that it's not Star Trek, It's Star Wars without the force.

Tomorrow: why the Star Trek movie must be the remnants of someone's screenplay for Top Gun 2.

In Honor of Star Trek weekend

Ball of confusion

I'm doing the usual thing listening to music and scouring the Internet while the wife watches Sister Act II and studies for finals. I have a lot of soul music keyed up. That's what I've been in the mood for. The O'jays, The Delfonics, James Carr, Solomon Burke and what pops up, Ball of Confusion by the Temptations. Literally seconds before the nuns sing it in the movie.

Here are some songs that are getting me through lately.

Backstabbers The O'Jays.
Papa was a rolling stone, The Temptations
A whole lot of James Carr who has one of the best soul voices I've ever heard but the highlights include, The Dark End of the Street, Pouring Water on a Drowning Man and You've got my mind messed up.

Cry To Me, Solomon Burke

Across 110 Street by Bobby Womack

I am now watching the Sister Act II scene. And the circle is complete

Twitterific

Yeah, so after a gentle nudge from my boss I am now twittering. It occurs to me that I have a weird job. Anywho, the twitter widget is at the bottom right of the page and you can follow me, if you know what that is and how to do it.

My first twitters follow


# Looking for pirates. It's a long story. I'll give you the link tomorrow.about 1 hour ago from web

# now I'm looking for firefox twitter aps. about 2 hours ago from web

# I watched Terminator last night. Clearly, twitter is the beginning of Sky Net. Eventually the machines grow tired of 140 characters and kill about 2 hours ago from web

# And I was the remote control in my house. Son, go change the channel. My Pa would say. Course, there was only three channels.about 2 hours ago from web

# I'm just saying I can remember when no one had cell phones because they were big and bulky and expensive.about 2 hours ago from web

# The question at the top says what are you doing? The answer, learning how to work twitter. God, I feel old.about 2 hours ago from web

Someone help this guy out

His woman has done him wrong.

Mark Waid has better references than you

For the comic geeks among us.

BM: You joined Crossgen around 2001, taking the reigns on a couple of titles and launching several new ones. What was that experience like?

MW: Like being first mate on the Pequod.

Read the rest of the interview here.

Clearly the Internets were invented for this purpose

Ben Grimm Skiing. Catch a wave.

More GI Joe resolute

Some background on the making of GI Joe Resolute by screenwriter Warren Ellis.

The people at Hasbro were actually remarkably supportive. And I did apologise after shouting at them those times. And they did give me one of those conversations that you never really expect to have when growing up:

HASBRO: No, Warren, you cannot wipe Beijing from the face of the earth.

Read more about it Here.

The coolest thing

The coolest thing I have seen lately is here.

Pulitzers

The Pulitzers came out today. Surprisingly, I'm not on the list. The New Orleans Picayune was a finalist with the detective story every crime writer tries to do with every murder. It's much, much better than I'm making it sound.

You can read it here

I need to try this

If it works in New York City I bet it will work in PC.

From The Times -

"Over the years, the shack has been home to a rogues’ gallery of cast-iron characters: Guy Passant of The Times, or “Putt-Putt,” for the way he seemed to be always on the move; Vinnie Lee of The Daily News, a big man whose appetite for a good story and Heinekens was the stuff of legend; and Patrick Doyle, a k a The Inspector because of his ability to suggest when questioning rank-and-file police officers that he was a police superior, without saying so outright.

“It’s Doyle from headquarters,” was one of his true, if misleading, ways to begin a conversation. In a suit and fedora, he showed up at crime scenes for The News looking like he belonged, just another detective with work to do. “He’d just walk right past the yellow tape,” said John Kifner, 67, who worked in the shack for The Times."

I'm gonna rent myself a house

In the shade of the freeway

Thou Art Awesome

And then sometimes

Life works out pretty well. Britain's Got Talent craziness here.

Someone should always be around to feed me grapes too.

On Saturday night The Ten Commandments came on at work and I was watching it. Yeah, yeah it's a tough job sometimes. Anyway, there is a scene early on where Charlton Heston, still a prince of Egypt, goes to see his step dad, Pharaoh. And two women prance around in front of Heston throwing rose petals at his feet. I think they were chanting something like, "Make way for the prince."

Brady: See, that's what my life should be like. Everywhere I go there should be people should be there to throw flowers at my feet.

Editor Person: Oh My God now I understand you completely. (Mimicks a lightbulb going off over her head.) This explains so, so much.

Brady: ... Surely you agree that I deserve it!

The worst Trek

Topless Robot names the worst TNG episodes ever here.

I dunno that one where Worf was injured and wanted his (very young) son help him commit suicide was pretty awful and probably deserved to make the list. That one ended, as I recall, with Crusher remembering that Worf had two spines or some such nonsense.

Actually nevermind every episode of TNG was miles better than any episode of DS9.




Q: Picard wouldn't have hit me.
HAWK: I'm not Picard!


And while we're on the subject why wasn't there a Spenser for Hire spinoff called Hawk: SuperFly Street Hero.

You know every episode of HSFSH ends with Hawk about to get killed and then Spencer shows up and saves him.

Easter

I like music

But not like these guys like the Grateful Dead.

I mean if it were the Allman Brothers I could chat with you about which version of the band was the best. The first one of course when Duane was still alive. Or how Steve Earle should make more bluegrass albums or whatnot. But man, there's liking music and then there's obsessive compulsive disorder.

The New York Times has it here.

What the GI Joe movie should be

But won't be. This one is kind of hard to watch. Or at least it was on my $10 monitor. Make it full screen and hang on.

The president feels it too

"Last night he said he felt like he had just discovered David Axelrod was one of the Final Five, whatever that means."

The Battlestar Galactica finale made Obama sad. Or so says The Onion.

The Answer

Newspapers are dying in this economy. Finally, someone has come up with the answer to save us all.

Last one I promise

Sorry, I couldn't leave this batch of posts without including my main man.

Ladies and Gentlemen, the late great Waylon Jennings.

This just in

Joe Cocker is still alive. I am shocked. I mean every image I've ever seen of the man he looked worse than Belushi. He even released an album in '07.

Anywho, I only know this song because it was the theme to the Wonder Years. Some of you are shouting, 'shut up you youngin'.'" The rest of you are going, 'The Wonder Years, what's that?'"

A short history of the BSG universe (SPOILERS)

Here is a short history of the universe according to Battlestar Galactica.


Don't read any further if you haven't seen the finale.




2009 - You are here.
Anytime you are at a newspaper stand look for Ron Moore, Gauis Baltar and Caprica Six. Then ask yourself, 'Why am I at a newspaper stand when all this information is free online?'"


150,000 years ago - Admiral Adama leads the remnants of the colonies to a new planet (our planet) that is just getting started. The humans who live there are soooo old they don't even have their own language. They all sound like Maurice Chevalier.
Also, Starbuck performs every action the plot required and disappeared without a word of explanation. She was either a Dues Ex Machina or a Ghost in the Machine. You pick.

150,000 years before that - 5 Cylons manage to invent a bunch of other cylons and give them the ability to resurrect themselves making them functionally immortal. It's a good thing too, because their planet (which is not our planet even though they're calling it Earth) is about to be destroyed in a nuclear war.


Sometime before that - God creates humans. He gives them a heck of an imagination.


As for the finale, I liked it. I really, really liked it.

Once more with feeling

This one is for Joe who never lets me forget that I am a Buffy fan. Hey Joe what's that behind you? Oh right, it's your 30s.



Also, a quick bit of love to the nitwits at 20th Century Fox who made this much harder than it should have been. Way to embrace the internets, fools.

Willie is in town

He's playing Panama City Tonight. Ummm he's sick and the show was postponed till October. Still, Seven Spanish Angels is maybe the best cowboy song ever.
We have a full fledged theme this week. Look for something spectacular tomorrow.

We seem to have hit a theme

Funny how it requires very little writing on my part. My wife loves this song. Look for The Red Headed Stranger tomorrow.

He was just 18 proud and brave but a Yankee put him in his grave

The greatest song of the last century? If not why not?

Meanwhile in the land of good music

I was going to write this long post about Levon Helm and the sound of American music. But forget it, I'm old and tired and if you don't get it I probably can't explain it to you.

Shut up and learn something.

UGH

This should probably go without saying. But Will.I.Am is not this generation's Bob Dylan. And anyone who makes that comparison deserves to have their product die and quick a death.

Bob Dylan wrote songs that mattered and were about important subjects and changed people's lives. And when I say he changed people's lives the people I mean include Paul McCartney, John Lennon, Bruce Springsteen and Brian Wilson.

His songs include the lonesome death of hattie carroll, we shall be released, master's of war, tangled up in blue, blowin' in the wind and like a rolling stone.

Will.I.Am is responsible for let's get retarded and my humps.

Dear Pepsi,

Are you SERIOUS?

Every rose has it's thorns

Currently listening to Every Rose has it's thorns, the original hair metal ballad. Look, Poison sucks, but every crappy band/singer/artist usually has one great song in them. Don't believe me, how about this: Ice Ice Baby.

15 years later every one in my age group can recite you all the lyrics to that one. Also, someone please tell Kelly Clarkson that "My Life Would Suck Without You," is the worst song title since "Honky Tonk Badondakadonk."

And no, I have no Idea how to spell Badonkadonk. In the comment section below tell me of your most horrific band who gave you one great song.

That or your best concert experience. Mine was B.B. King in Washington D.C. He sat down the whole time and still sang and played better than everyone in today's top 100.

IKIRU

There was a blog question about your favorite movie on one of the blogs I read. The forst one that came to mind was Ikiru. It's Akira Kurasawa's take on It's A Wonderful Life. The movie opens with Ikiru, a mid level bureacrat in postwar Japan learning that he's got a fatal illness. He does what many people would do in that situation, he drinks, he parties, he tries to reconcile with his grown son.

... And, ultimately he finds a purpose. I don't want to tell you more. I don't want to ruin it. Go buy it, you'll love it.

Who watches the Saturday morning Watchmen

It is really, really disturbing. Watchmen Cartoon

Grandma roadtrip

So a couple of months ago my grandmother showed up at my door at 8:15 a.m.

Grandma: Are you off today?

Brady: (long pause) uhhhh yes.

Grandma: I need you to take me to a funeral in Blakely.

Brady: (long pause) uhhhh ok.

Grandma needed me to drive because the funeral was in the afternoon and granddad didn't want her driving after dark. So, at about 11 a.m. we're off.

Brady: Umm do you know how to get to Blakely?
Grandma: Yes.

Turned out that the real answer to that question was I knew how to get to Blakely 20 years ago but now I'm not so sure.

We got to the Interstate and it became clear that she really wasn't sure which road to turn on. The road was near the Interstate and after asking the UPS guy at Subway for directions we found it.

Brady: Uhhh Grandma, when we get to Blakely do you know which funeral home to go to?
Grandma: There's only one funeral home in Blakely.

Actually there was only one funeral home in Blakely 20 years ago. We passed three funeral homes on the way into the city.

Luckily the helpful person at McDonalds told us which funeral home to go to. But when we got there grandma seemed confused. She pointed out that she didn't recognize the people who were going into the funeral home. I thought, oh dear is there really a funeral today? Does grandma really know these people? Is she having a senior moment that has now cost me my day off?

Then, the people she knew arrived and it was all good. Well as good as things were going to get at a funeral.

I really didn't know the woman, other than I was somehow related to her and she used to be Ted Turner's girlfriend.

Still in the car Grandma told me stories. She pointed out a church where the members erected a sign that says that only church members could be buried in their cemetery. Apparently, years ago someone wanted to bury a child who was not the right color and there was a fight. And now, there is a sign.

She also talked about her most memorable birthday. She was a teenager and it was her birthday and the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor.

That's right kids my grandmother and Vito Corleone share a birthday. Which confirms some theories I've had about my family connections to The Family.

Fear the Dixie Mafia.

The wine was sour so I threw it out

Watching The Agony and the Ecstacy. It's about Michelangelo painting the Sistine Chapel. It is quite quite good. It's about the struggle of the artist to remain true to his craft even when idiots and bullies and fools stand in the way. It was a movie I needed to see today.

The central struggle is Pope Julius II vs. Michelangelo. The pope wants the ceiling painted and wants it to be good and quick and cheap. Michelangelo tries to do this but discovers that the wine is sour.
So, he throws paint on everything and runs away. While away he has a vision from God, comes back to the pope, who wants to hang him, and tells him how it's gonna be. Which leads to this exchange.

Soldier: That's not what you wanted.
Pope: No, I wanted a ceiling. He wants a miracle.

Heh ...

Here's what wikipedia has to say: The composition eventually contained over 300 figures and had at its center nine episodes from the Book of Genesis, divided into three groups: God's Creation of the Earth; God's Creation of Humankind and their fall from God's grace; and lastly, the state of Humanity as represented by Noah and his family. On the pendentives supporting the ceiling are painted twelve men and women who prophesied the coming of the Jesus. They are seven prophets of Israel and five Sibyls, prophetic women of the Classical world.

Pope: When will you make an end of it?
Michaelangelo: When it is finished!

Just go get a copy

Ok, so like 4 people have asked me if they could borrow a copy of Watchmen. The thing is I dog eared my copy and sold it to some dude in India during the great purge. And, and I can't tell you how annoying it is that all these people have come late to the party. I mean, remember when you were in high school and you found that band and you loved them and you were there first. And then they ruined it by getting super famous and everyone around you was like, 'hey have you heard of these guys."
And your like, "yeah loser I heard of them last year and I got their t-shirt and the vinyl."

It's kind of like that for me.
Also, Watchmen isn't something you can borrow. It's a serious in depth work that requires multiple reading to fully appreciate. You ain't gonna get it over the weekend, you know.

So, here are some Watchmen buying options. Do yourself a favor and go get a copy. And do me a favor and buy it here cause I could use the shiny nickel.






HARDCOVER




THE VERSION BRADY WANTS

For BSG fans only

Last night when Baltar had his little problem I had a vision during the episode. It was Baltar grabbing a bunch of guns in secret and Adama catching him.
It went something like this:

Int. Galactica Weapons Storage locker. Baltar is grabbing a heap load of guns and ammunition while singing "Whistle While You Work." Adama walks in and they look at each other sideways.

BALTAR
Hi

ADAMA
Yo

(Adama turns to leave.)

BALTAR
Hey, wait a minute aren't you going to say something?

ADAMA
'Bout what?

BALTAR
I'm stealing guns!

ADAMA
Yeah, but the great thing about this show is if you kill anyone important we can retroactively make them a cylon and bring them back.

BALTAR
(Scooby voice)
ARROH?

ADAMA
I mean how long have we been on this wacky ship? 20 - 30 years. I just want to spend my days drinking hard liquor, reading poetry, sleeping with the president of the colonies and crying manly cries with my second in command.

BALTAR
But, but you can't trust me with a bunch of guns. I'm Gaius Baltar the betrayer of humanity. I'm responsible for the total annihilation of the colonies. I made a fake cylon detector that left us all in incredible danger and got you shot. I was the worst president in this or any other reality (well, maybe). Every time you ever handed me anything I turned it into a weapon and stabbed you in the back with it. Granted, lately I haven't done much beside lead a cult of mindless sycophants but I'm a very,very bad man.

ADAMA
Look, do you want the guns or not?

BALTAR
Yes, please.

ADAMA
Well, there you go.
(ADAMA walks out whistling "High Hopes.")

And that my friends would be less ridiculous than what happened last night when Baltar convinced ADAMA, ROSLIN and ADAMA Jr. to hand him and his clan a bunch of guns. That was the first misstep this season but boy was it a doozy.

On the other hand I loved Tigh's speech about not wanting to say he loved someone. Powerful, powerful stuff.

coolest mandolin player ever

I wanted to embed the youtube video but some marketing genius somewhere thinks it's better to make things harder for fans.

Anyway, here's the link. Copperhead Road

Furious

Watching Mystery Men. Had this conversation about Ben Stiller's character

Amber
What's his power?

Brady
He gets furious!

Amber
So he's like Nick Fury?

Brady
No,Nick Fury's power is to shoot you in the head.



Nick Fury rocks. Even Hasselhoff couldn't kill him.

And then there are these guys

For whom no amount of money would be enough.

Take it away New York Times

Five hundred thousand dollars — the amount President Obama wants to set as the top pay for banking executives whose firms accept government bailout money — seems like a lot, and it is a lot. To many people in many places, it is a princely sum to live on. But in the neighborhoods of New York City and its suburban enclaves where successful bankers live, half a million a year can go very fast.

And this:

Few are playing sad cellos over the fate of such folk, especially since the collapse of the institutions they run has yielded untold financial pain. But in New York, where a new study from the Center for an Urban Future, a nonprofit research group in Manhattan, estimates it takes $123,322 to enjoy the same middle-class life as someone earning $50,000 in Houston, extricating oneself from steep bills can be difficult.

Cry me a river.

Money, Money, Money

How much have you got saved? Yeah, I don't have anything either except that crummy 401k. But, these two links got me thinking.

This one shows you how much you can save over a given period.

This one shows you how much you need to save to make it to 1 MILLION DOLLARS.

Impossible? Mayhaps but what else have you got to do for the next 20 or 30 years?

Also, Brady highly recommends this site getrichslowly.org/blog/.

Go away now. I have much to ponder.

A dangerous criminal if ever I saw one

This is such a long story.

Things heard in a newsroom

“I have papers from the Challenger disaster and they’re falling apart.” Tony November 6, 2008

“You people are sick and twisted and I’m glad I know you.” Tony November 6, 2008

“You’ve got reflexes like a man who’s only had one heartattack.” Brady Calhoun… November 6, 2008

“[Brady], you are the biggest baby hater I know.” Melissa November 14, 2008

“There’s a Hello Kitty exclusively at Zales. That would be the equivalent of a Ghostbusters Rolex line.” nameless drone… December 4, 2008

“We might be glorifying the drug dealer.” My boss on “Southport man was found shot to death inside home” — which was the wrong headline anyway… December 11, 2008

“I don’t have the body of a stripper but… maybe someday.” Brady Calhoun… December 12, 2008

Payback

So, for months I've been listening to Bill O'Reilly claim that the reason the New York Times, CBS, NBC and other news organizations are having trouble is because they lean left. And Clearly, CLEARLY, the American people don't want what the left has to offer. I mean, it's not like the American people just voted for a bunch of Democrats to run Washington or anything.

Anywho, all that silliness from Bill makes this headline even sweeter.

News Corp. loses $6.4 billion in 2Q

That would be the News Corp. that owns Fox News.

Heh. heh ha ha ha

Also, to Mr. Seth Godin, the insufferable "marketing guru" who gave us this bit of genius, "What will you miss about newspapers."

Umm you sir are asking the wrong question and predicting the wrong future.
Because a lot of newspaper companies are in trouble that means that NEWSPAPERS are in trouble.

Let me ask it another way

ABC, NBC and CBS are in trouble. What will you miss about television shows?

Penny dreadfuls are in trouble. What will you miss about books?

Even better - All the major automakers are in trouble. What will miss about cars?

Both of you twits need to go away.

This one's for Rob

This is what you get for singing me that song over and over again. An explanation of this silliness is here.

G.I. Joe continued

DAVID
Really? Really?

I saw the commercial and there was nothing cool about it. It looked like the X-men, only without super powers - and thus, not as cool.

When they shoot lasers, do you think they're going to kill people, or are they going to all just lie down unconscious?

BRADY
Snake Eyes Storm Shadow fight is all I require and the Baroness looks cool. PLUS SHUT UP I'm trying to sell some old comics. I'll be sure and sell them before the movie comes out and bombs.

Although I will agree that Stephen Sommers sucks and this could be as bad as Van Helsing but I am hopeful.

also, to be true to the spirit of GI JOE they would all have to lie down and be unconscious. STILL, this has got to be better than that crummy crummy transformers movie.

DAVID
Yeah, but why is Snake Eyes even hanging out with the GI Joe crew. He's all power walking with the whole gang down a street? I don't think so.

I didn't see the Baroness, but that's because I was occupied already. I'll check out the trailer again.

And ugh, Transformers - I saw the Transformers 2 trailer, and double ugh.

BRADY
OK yeah, I'm with you there. Ninjas should be sneaky not all out in the open. But he's a super ninja. He can be invisible even when people are looking at him.

DAVID
He's so invisible that he's visible.

Forget cable I have netflix

I skipped the Superbowl. I didn't miss anything right? RIGHT?

Can I give you my $20 now?

I mean seriously, I love this and want to give you my money now.



Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow sword fight. I don't need much else.

And the fact that I am talking up this trailer has nothing to do with the fact that I have a bunch of old G.I. Joe comics that I want to sell for 1 Million Dollars.

Love in the year of the comet

Is one of my favorite stories.

I once saw Tony rip out Neil Gaiman's liver and eat it raw. Now, when you ask Neil how he's doing he just points at the rotten bandages and cries.

That is all.

How Long can Bully keep this up

365 days with Ben Grimm day 25. How Long can Bully keep this up?

I had a dream

I don't dream much or I don't remember much of them but this one stuck with me so I thought I would share.

I was dead and I was on the island from Lost. I don't exactly remember what was going on but yeah it was important and I was dead and I was on Lost island.

Then I was with one of my oldest friends in a limo because he had won $90 million in the Lottery. I was asking him for $5,000 to help me start a comic book company. But he wouldn't give it to me.

Later, another friend told me, "Of course he wouldn't give you $5,000 you were dead."

Then I woke up and said to myself, Self, that is the last time I eat a big sandwich from Firehouse, watch the season premiere of Lost and then go to bed.

MIcrosoft and irony

So Today Microsoft announced that they are laying off 5,000 people. These are the headlines on my (microsoft provided) hotmail page.

Job Trends for Rough Times Careers to help you sail through a tough economy
13 Companies hiring now (Microsoft is presumbably not among them)
Careers for happy workers


Really, Really someone at Microsoft is laughing their butts off. Or laughing their blues away.

We all make mistakes, We don't all immortalize them

Ok, so as you see from my last post I like the new president. I wish him well and hope that he turns the country around .... BUT there is a bit of craziness creeping into some of my brethren journalists who seem to have given up on objective journalism and have become cheerleaders. I mean, the reason why we all hate Fox News is because they abhor objectivity in favor of supporting THE RIGHT. However, it's hard to criticize them when some journalism overlord approves a headline like this - Obama Raises Hand Lifts Nation.

I think we can all agree that Obama the presidency is a unique moment in American history. I wouldn't want to diminish that and if the headline had been on an opinion piece I would have been with you brother. BUT this headline was on a hard news story.

So you would think that the day after it ran someone, somewhere would have gotten past Obamamania and reexamined ourselves for unbiased reporting. We would have asked hard questions about how we presented information and if we had gone just a tinsy bit too far.

At the very least we wouldn't have put the offending headline on a T-Shirt.

Right? Right?

Barack and roll

Tomorrow some reviews and I hope to finish a short story this week. ...ummm maybe.

In the meantime, Congrats Mr. President

Of good guys and bad

I really liked Appaloosa. It's way better than that horrid remake of 3:10 to Yuma at least. However, it suffers from one of the things that drive me crazy in movies, where the hero has the villian at his mercy and doesn't kill him even though you know that villian is gonna come right back and start more trouble. There are a couple of moments like that in the movie. It's made even worse because Jeremy Irons plays a great villian that you really really want to kill. It gets even worse for me when a judge orders Irons to be hanged and the deputies take him somewhere else to hang him. Which of course (spoiler) gives him a chance to escape. 

I mean, come on, he's got a death sentence. Just shoot him in the head already. 

I complain too much. This is a great movie that I really liked despite that flaw. 7 thumbs up. 

* The previous headline on this post (Just Shoot him Already) was a little bit of problem given that it followed a bunch of pictures of the President. Oh well. Live and Learn.

I haven't read the book but hey it's probably alright.

The Spirit

I haven't seen the movie or read much of the comics. But Kyle Baker makes me want to see it.

I collect spores, molds and fungus

Yeah, yeah, yeah shut up. I've been sick. Being sick makes me depressed. Being depressed makes it hard to write anything not required by my Journalism Overlords. We have a keymaster and a gatekeeper at work too.

Anyway, Ghostbusters seems to be making the rounds so I thought i would talk about it.

At work lately, there seems to be a lot of people screaming, "Don't cross the streams."

and
Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!

and

She's not my girlfriend. I find her interesting because she's a client and because she sleeps above her covers... *four feet* above her covers.

That last one is just me but you get the idea.

I keep seeing GB references online too. Weird. You'd think there was a DVD out recently.




OK, This flick is a classic and was made back when Bill Murray was funny. Believe it or not once upon a time Bill Murray was not the sad guy in every flick. Instead, he was witty. Lots of movie comedians think they're witty. They are not, they are talky. You know who you are. Talk less and be funny more.

Alright, that's it. Take me now sub creature.
USELESS IMDB trivia take it away.

Huey Lewis and the News turned down an offer to write and record a theme song for Ghostbusters. They later sued Ray Parker Jr. for plagiarism, citing the similarities between his theme song and their earlier hit "I Want a New Drug.

Sometimes you got to get mean

Somtimes you just got to get mean. 

Now remember, things look bad and it looks like you're not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean. I mean plumb, mad-dog mean. 'Cause if you lose your head and you give up then you neither live nor win. That's just the way it is.

It gives me a chuckle

Breaking Bad - The Complete First Season

I'm watching Breaking Bad right now. The wife is laughing at me. What is it with you and drug shows?

Well she's got a point. I mean I watch Weeds, Dexter, The Shield and The Sopranos, and well anything else where the main character does VERY BAD THINGS. Drug shows. Who knew that American television would see a rush to these kinds of entertainments. I think it says something about this decade that our heroes are all criminals.

This is the dark time. Which makes me wonder what Hollywood will cook up in the Obama era.

Anywho, Breaking Bad is fairly good. Although they jump around in time for no apparent reason. Everybody wants to be Tarantino. You know, I want to be Tarantino. But sometimes the most Tarantino thing you can do is tell your story. 

 

Lost comes back

Lost O Rama

Lost comes back this month. I'm not sure I care about any of the characters except for Desmond and Penny. I think they killed all the wrong people.
Eko and Charlie? FAIL.
Plus I'm just tired of the questions with no answers. Everyone is glowingly cryptic all the time. Just say what you mean. You know.
The show has it's moments though, starting with the first Locke episode. Too bad they turned Locke into complete moron. Each season he does something to earn the Homer Simpson award.
Jack isn't much better. Look at me I have daddy issues and I drive the women away. But you know at least this show tries. Which is more than can be said of 90 percent of the other junk out there.
So yes, even though I whine, I'll watch every episode this season. Just like you.

I leave you with the best moment of the show ever. Too bad it wasn't on the show.

12 Ordinary Men

What was it like to eat dinner with God? Or to listen to him teach? Or to let him instruct you on prayer? 12 Ordinary Men explores the lives of the disciples in a fresh way.
Too often, the people in the bible become superheroes, magical creatures who do what is right with God's help. But authors like John MacArthur show us that they were real people who had real struggles and that they weren't much different from us today.
We always give the disciples grief for having so little faith. But if a man came to you today and said that he was the bread of life would you believe him. And if you didn't believe him at first when would you start? When he turned water into wine? When he fed the multitudes? When he calmed the seas? When he raised the dead?
In truth, it took the resurrection to change their lives. The resurrection is changing lives still.

Twelve Ordinary Men: How the Master Shaped His Disciples for Greatness, and What He Wants to Do with You

Twelve Extraordinary Women: How God Shaped Women of the Bible, and What He Wants to Do with You

Matlock

Me: You know I went to court and that defense attorney did not act like Matlock. I am amazed how defense attorneys never do what Matlock did. The dude never lost.

Coworker: Yeah, I remember thinking the same thing the last time I went to court. According to Matlock you did not actually defend your client all you did was investigate cases.

Me: exactly

Coworker: In real life that wouldn't work out all you would find out was that your client was guilty.

Me: Matlock freed some guilty people. There were at least two very special episodes.

Coworker: I'm sure that's a guilt he lived with forever.

Me: yeah.

You guys got the best part of this conversation. Before this we were talking about how car chases in real life should be more like the car chases on the A-Team.

The New Year

2008 sucked. Onward and upward.

Resolutions:

To lose 50 pounds

To pay off the credit cards and save $5,000.

To finish the script and the book.

To start the comic book company.

In the last year I have had some successes. I finished a script for Burn Notice and sent it off to the Walt Disney fellowship. I got rejected but felt great because I had finished something. The script is still here and is what J Michael Staczinski calls an evergreen. Meaning, while it is of little use to me now it may be useful in the future.

I paid off some of my debt. We've got three big debts and some smaller ones. We're paying on one regularly and two others when we can. We have a small emergency account that needs to grow. This is the one area of my life that I really care about the most. I read this blog http://getrichslowly.org/blog/, a lot. I don't know if it helps, but at least it gives me ideas now and then.

The Comic Book Company: It's been a dream since I was a child. I have several comic scripts written. The problem is artists seem to want to be paid for their work. Imagine that. Anyway, if the finances get straightened out completely then I will take a hard look at hiring an artist.

The movie script is in decent shape but still needs work. The novel has 10,000 words. Now I only need 70,000 more.

How about you? Any plans for 2009?